Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Good morning sunshine

So we are 31 weeks and I am really not sure what that translates into, somewhere in third trimester. I am beginning to feel super tired again and my sleep is becoming less restful as each night passes.

Mornings have never been my favourite event of the day, but this is more true than ever. First off I can hardly believe that I need to pee again. Secondly due to baby's position I am unable to roll over without great discomfort. This morning was a particularly bright one for me.

I opened my wee eyes and turned off the alarm. Then struggled painfully to roll over like a beached baby beluga, while my hubby just lay there and watch his breakfast television. I am finally over and trying to focus on the traffic report when our cat smudgie jumps up onto the bed and is slowly walking up to my head area. Really nothing pisses me off more in the morning than the cats or so I thought. The meowing, the loud purring and the complete violation of my personal space.

Smudgie is now trying to squeeze her fat body between hubby and I, rubbing her ass on my arm. As hubby gets up she takes off and leaves what appears to be a lump of shit on my forearm. I most passed out!

Me: Son of a bitch, oh God (squealing)
DH: What, what
Me: Look at my damn arm, that God damn cat left a cling-on on my arm.
DH: After assessing the situation as I must be lying or something, he is now buckled over in hysterics
Me: (Gagging and trying to not to throw up as I struggle to roll over and get out of bed.) "GET ME SOMETHING TO WIPE THIS"! (my arm in the air)
DH: Not moving, just laughing and holding his damn belly. "Oh God to funny, Oh God".
Me: Seriously babe I will throw up.
DH: struggles to get some TP and comes back still unable to catch his breath.
Me: Nice morning!

So I am in the shower vigorously scrubbing my arm as I think, nobody should have to wake up this way. I am in a no better situation than a homeless guy waking up to a dog peeing on him. It's wrong. Who walks away from a litter with a cling on. Better yet who wipes it on the person that provides you a home and food.

Bottom line...Cat for Sale!

1 comment:

Brianne said...

All cats are evil. Period.

My cat likes to look for full glasses of anything that are sitting on tables, coasters, or anything flat before jumping up, making sure no one is watching, and then knocking it over to spill the contents everywhere.

Not that this compares to getting crapped on, because just the thought of that grosses me out, but it only reiterates my point that cats = evil.